Remember the opening of Reservoir Dogs? After the initial scene in the diner, that group of totally cool, totally badass dudes walks in slow motion down the sidewalk and viewers immediately know, these guys are the guys you don’t want to mess with.
That was us; my buddies and I. It was a getaway weekend for the boys in Montreal, and we were just dripping with swagger.
Except, not really. None of us were wearing a black suit with a skinny black tie and cool shades. We didn’t call each other Mr. Blonde and Mr. Pink and Mr. Blue. And as far as I know, nobody committed any heinous crimes while we were away.
Plus we arrived in a minivan instead of a couple of early ‘80s Cadillacs.
Okay, truth be told, we were just a bunch of regular guys. Some of us missing more hair than we’d like to admit. Some of us haven’t seen a gym in a while and one of us still lives with his mom. Yeah, a real bunch of hard-nosed tough guys, for sure.
But despite the minivan’s current image of being quite possibly the most uncool vehicle for sale today, there was not a single of peep of disdain about my booking Honda’s mommy bus for our adventure to Canada’s most fashionable (and likely most car-crazy) city. This even though I could have just as easily arranged for a luxo-barge SUV with a swanky badge on it.
There may be bigger vehicles. There may be more powerful vehicles. There may be more luxurious vehicles that show the world how big a lease payment you can swing, but no vehicle masters space efficiency the way a contemporary minivan like this Odyssey can do. And that, kind reader is why nobody complained about travelling 1,500 km round trip in a beast guaranteed not to make the ladies swoon.
Nor should my friends complain. Not only did they get a chauffeured ride, door-to-door, but in considerable comfort too, regardless of where any of the six of us were settled inside the Honda’s cavernous cabin. A cabin that offers more passenger volume than the competitors from Toyota, Kia and Chrysler, I should add.
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Naturally, front-seat passengers enjoy all the amenities of most modern cars: comfortable bucket seats (heated of course) and independent climate controls. So too do the second-row passengers. Heck, even the third row (that splits and does a disappearing trick into the floor when not needed) reclines and was the preferred perch for those of us needing our mid-afternoon beauty sleep while en route to the next province over.
Had the Reservoir Dogs needed to cart around bodies (minus an ear or two), they’d have considerably more space in the back of the Odyssey than in even those gargantuan trunks of the old Cadillacs (with 4,205 L of total cargo volume, the Odyssey is just a few litres short of the Toyota Sienna). Prying eyes would be kept at bay thanks to the deeply tinted windows, with privacy reinforced by the retractable sunscreens on the rear passenger windows too. What’s more, cleaning up messes that could otherwise be held against them a court of law is a snap thanks to the built-in Shop-Vac at the rear of the cargo area.