Topic: The things that make me sad, angry, and upset

[Firm]

Man, that's irritating. I'd be having no part of that, family or not. It's one thing to help out friends/family once or twice if something truly random and unfortunate happens to them, but if they're just financial clowns, nope, I am out. 

[WP v3.32]

I'm not 100% sure. The basement had a really bad leak from a bunch of places years ago, like you could hear water running behind walls and under the platform they had built to level the basement. I can only imagine the amount of mold and rot there is behind the walls of this basement. When they first bought the house you could tell it was a quick/cheap flip. Home Depot cabinets, some cheap laminate, the fixtures in the kitchen/bathroom were all cheap and leaking, the exterior stucco was falling off from rot, windows needed to be done....just an utter money pit, but they loved the looks of the kitchen and laminate  Also, he is DIY adverse, I have to play Bob Villa and car mechanic every visit because he can't run a screwdriver.

Fake an illness for a year  ...

[Fobroader]

Man, that's irritating. I'd be having no part of that, family or not. It's one thing to help out friends/family once or twice if something truly random and unfortunate happens to them, but if they're just financial clowns, nope, I am out. 

Thats kind of where I am already at, the wife is 80% there, I just really like lending huge quantities, in this case there is no amount, think how long is a piece of string, to family. Also, because I am not there, I don't know who they are hiring, if the work is getting done right, what else should be done while they are in there. Oh, I forgot, the house has to be rewired at some point because knob and tube wiring tied into. To me, its like doing a full, frame off resto on a 2004 Elantra, there is no way they will ever get their money back because of the houses location and neighborhood.

[Fobroader]

I'm not 100% sure. The basement had a really bad leak from a bunch of places years ago, like you could hear water running behind walls and under the platform they had built to level the basement. I can only imagine the amount of mold and rot there is behind the walls of this basement. When they first bought the house you could tell it was a quick/cheap flip. Home Depot cabinets, some cheap laminate, the fixtures in the kitchen/bathroom were all cheap and leaking, the exterior stucco was falling off from rot, windows needed to be done....just an utter money pit, but they loved the looks of the kitchen and laminate  Also, he is DIY adverse, I have to play Bob Villa and car mechanic every visit because he can't run a screwdriver.

Fake an illness for a year  ...

Thats a good idea.....

[JohnnyMac]

That definitely would be shitty.  It’s a classic lose lose situation.  Don’t help and get guilt tripped and shunned forever, or pay them knowing it’s just setting your money on fire.  I help my sisters and in-laws, but only if absolutely necessary and I choose how to help and not them.  I’m a strong believe in people having to learn from their mistakes, otherwise things never change with them.

Are your in laws helping them?  Any other siblings that can help? 

[Fobroader]

That definitely would be shitty.  It’s a classic lose lose situation.  Don’t help and get guilt tripped and shunned forever, or pay them knowing it’s just setting your money on fire.  I help my sisters and in-laws, but only if absolutely necessary and I choose how to help and not them.  I’m a strong believe in people having to learn from their mistakes, otherwise things never change with them.

Are your in laws helping them?  Any other siblings that can help?

Unfortunately, my FIL is a complete and utter tightwad, and my wife is only sibling. We are the only DINKs, in the family, so we are the "rich" ones that can swing it. Like if I don't help, I'm a huge Richard, if I do help, I feel like I just had a campfire with many, many dollars....

[sszoomzoom]

That definitely would be shitty.  It’s a classic lose lose situation.  Don’t help and get guilt tripped and shunned forever, or pay them knowing it’s just setting your money on fire.  I help my sisters and in-laws, but only if absolutely necessary and I choose how to help and not them.  I’m a strong believe in people having to learn from their mistakes, otherwise things never change with them.

Are your in laws helping them?  Any other siblings that can help?

Unfortunately, my FIL is a complete and utter tightwad, and my wife is only sibling. We are the only DINKs, in the family, so we are the "rich" ones that can swing it. Like if I don't help, I'm a huge Richard, if I do help, I feel like I just had a campfire with many, many dollars....

That sucks.
How about they get the money from the bank? That’s why they there for.

[Fobroader]

That definitely would be shitty.  It’s a classic lose lose situation.  Don’t help and get guilt tripped and shunned forever, or pay them knowing it’s just setting your money on fire.  I help my sisters and in-laws, but only if absolutely necessary and I choose how to help and not them.  I’m a strong believe in people having to learn from their mistakes, otherwise things never change with them.

Are your in laws helping them?  Any other siblings that can help?

Unfortunately, my FIL is a complete and utter tightwad, and my wife is only sibling. We are the only DINKs, in the family, so we are the "rich" ones that can swing it. Like if I don't help, I'm a huge Richard, if I do help, I feel like I just had a campfire with many, many dollars....

That sucks.
How about they get the money from the bank? That’s why they there for.

Thats what I said, apparently their line of credit is full up and they can't get a loan as they have too much debt.....

[Firm]

F-them, tough . They've obviously been foolish financially, no way I'd bail them out on this.
What I would do, is offer to help in other ways....want my honest opinion on the house, rents, contractors, sure. Want some help sorting out you're Financials and building a plan, sure. Hand outs, hard no.

[ktm525]

Until they come move in with you.

[sszoomzoom]

That definitely would be shitty.  It’s a classic lose lose situation.  Don’t help and get guilt tripped and shunned forever, or pay them knowing it’s just setting your money on fire.  I help my sisters and in-laws, but only if absolutely necessary and I choose how to help and not them.  I’m a strong believe in people having to learn from their mistakes, otherwise things never change with them.

Are your in laws helping them?  Any other siblings that can help?

Unfortunately, my FIL is a complete and utter tightwad, and my wife is only sibling. We are the only DINKs, in the family, so we are the "rich" ones that can swing it. Like if I don't help, I'm a huge Richard, if I do help, I feel like I just had a campfire with many, many dollars....

That sucks.
How about they get the money from the bank? That’s why they there for.

Thats what I said, apparently their line of credit is full up and they can't get a loan as they have too much debt.....

You are indeed a good brother in law for helping.
I know I won’t do this gesture if ever asked.
Just diss used this with the wife during dinner and she just said “no f…ing way I would give money to any of my siblings”. And she’s Canadian and grew up with very strong family values. One thing her parents tought the kids was money responsibility and never borrow from anywhere except the bank.

[rrocket]

No, god no, I would never attempt that. They've known about the vermiculite in the attic and the crap in the drywall/compound since they bought the house damn near 15 years ago, but now they want to reno because of the basement failure.

Wait, so they're not actually asking you for physical help, as in 'come help me reno my basement on the weekends', but rather, you're being asked to pay for the basement reno?

And your parents (whom I assume are 'elderly'), are encouraging this?  WTF.

What's wrong with just leaving the basement as is, if they don't have the money to fix it?  You are allowed to say 'No', you know.

The wife's parents were asking, not mine. They are just asking the wife and I to fund this feel good project and get paid back anytime from now till the second coming of christ....The basement leaks like a Canadian submarine and the concrete is failing in places so they figured, might as well modernize this POS house from the 60s that they bought as a flip and was very poorly put together and has several serious issues. I'm not adverse to helping them, but they bought this lemon of a house so long ago in a crappy part of town and I hate pouring money into a bottomless pit.

That would be a HARD NO from me.

Unless I have a contract with a repayment schedule and/or collateral.

If they don't like it...TOUGH LUCK.

You're not a charity or bank...family or not.

[Shorlaw]

Gotta love getting into the Macan this aft and finding this, great way to start the weekend!   

[Fobroader]

Ouch....the windshield on the stupid Ridgeline is $1200, couldn't imagine Porsche wanting less.

[PJungnitsch]

Yeah with the newer stuff often things need to get pried off the windshield and then recalibrated when they get glued back on

Miss my 199.00 Pontiac Vibe windshield replacement done in the driveway

[Fobroader]

Yeah with the newer stuff often things need to get pried off the windshield and then recalibrated when they get glued back on

Miss my 199.00 Pontiac Vibe windshield replacement done in the driveway

Yup, $215 for crackmasters to do the Jeep in the parking lot at work....sigh, those were the days lol

[Shorlaw]

Of course I also selected heated windshield from the option list!

[Fobroader]

Of course I also selected heated windshield from the option list!

[Dante]

Insurance no? Deductible only.

[dkaz]

I had my Mazda 5's windshield with rain sensor for the windshield wiper recalibrated for under $250 at one of the two. Then I had the back glass replaced at the other also for $250. That's without going through insurance.

Ok did some quotes through Windshield Surgeon (Glassmasters says they will get back by phone). $249 for the 5 with rain sensing wipers and $309 for the Soul with lane departure warning and forward collision avoidance. They'll usually recommend redoing the seals for $40 or so if it's more than 5-10 years old. So yea most Albertans do limited glass coverage on their vehicles.