A rundown of all the April Fools foolishness from our favourite automakers and media outlets

Automotive April Fools 2014 Jokes From Around The Web general news auto news
 

Road & Track - Kobayashi’s Caterham censored in Japanese F1 broadcasts

“At this point, we feel that it’s simply inappropriate to show his Caterham car on television,” a spokesperson explained. “There are children watching. The elderly may be watching. It’s a difficult situation.”

 
Automotive April Fools 2014 Jokes From Around The Web general news auto news
 

MINI - MINI shoots and scores: The MINI Paceman GoalCooper

Munich. The countdown is on in Brazil and soccer fans are gearing up for the biggest global sporting event of the year. Jerseys and flags are in huge demand but one question remains: what will be the car of choice for celebrating fans from mid June? MINI is sure to strike from outside the box with its homage to the beautiful game: the MINI Paceman GoalCooper.

This top international player is based on the MINI John Cooper Works Paceman, and is equipped with all it takes to make it from the group stages through to the final.  The MINI Design Team captained by Oliviero Weilinho combined the colours green, blue and yellow to come up with the exclusive Danielson multi-coloured exterior line, giving MINI an early 1:0 lead.

The interior kit is far from off-side, astro turf floor mats in Brasileiro Green and the “floodlights” in the shape of a MINI LED interior lighting package give a stadium like feel. With this equipment aboard the MINI Paceman GoalCooper will set off “Mexican waves” on all four seats.  It is match-fit when it comes to reliving controversial referee decisions and glorious goals via live web stream.  A universal holder for smartphones and a rear holder for the Apple iPad will ensure comfortable viewing on the rear seat terraces. For relieving pre-match tension or enjoying some half-time downtime the MINI Paceman GoalCooper features a miniature table football set mounted on the Center Rail.

The MINI Paceman GoalCooper is fully equipped for training between matches. The rear seatbacks can be folded over to turn the boot, which is fully clad in AstroTurf, into a football goal. The net is attached behind the front seats.  The MINI Paceman GoalCooper has a top defence line-up making it very difficult for any striker to score. As soon as the Park Distance Control (PDC) sensors, in conjunction with the interior monitoring sensors of the alarm system, register a shot on goal, the electric tailgate is operated, instantly closing the tailgate, reflecting the ball and keeping the box clean.

If a player successfully puts one past the ‘keeper’, he can share his success immediately with other MINI drivers.  When the final whistle has been blown after 90 minutes the score is transmitted to the iPad in the MINI via a special MINI Paceman GoalCooper MINI Connected App. Thanks to intelligent connectivity the results can be compared online with other registered users at any time. The table is updated every day and at the end of the tournament the MINI Community World Champion will lift the trophy.

The new star of the MINI Team will be officially presented on 1 April 2014. All details regarding transfer fees and contract periods will remain strictly confidential until then.

 
Automotive April Fools 2014 Jokes From Around The Web general news auto news
 

BMW UK - BMW Force Injection Booster – Driving slow never felt so fast

BMW looks set to change the face of motoring with the introduction of a patented artificial G-force technology.

BMW’s new Force Injection Booster simulates the effects of spirited driving, even when commuting at slower speeds, to create a thrilling ride. When activated at speeds under 20mph, the Force Injection Booster (FIB) works by extracting kinetic energy from the car’s engine and converting it into positive g-forces. These are then channelled directly at the driver and passengers through the air conditioning vents, while a mild electric current is delivered through the front seats, to simulate the same exhilarating feeling of driving at high speed*.

This technology comes complete with the BMW AirNet®, the latest in hair protection technology, to ensure that occupant’s don’t have to compromise between personal style and driving performance.  

Professor Mika Notbetrü, Head of BMW Innovation, describes FIB technology as “Mind-blowingly unbelievable”.

The Force Injection Booster will be available across the BMW range from 1 April, 2014. For more information on this optional feature please call 0800 093 6161 or email mika.notbetru@bmw.com.

*Face alteration is not permanent




About Mark Stevenson

Mark Stevenson is a former IT professional turned freelance automotive writer and news editor for Autos.ca. He's a member of the Automobile Journalists Association of Canada and former member of the Texas Automotive Writers Association (TAWA). Mark spends an inordinate amount of time on motorcycles and resides in Dartmouth, Nova Scotia with his two dogs - Nismo and Maloo. You can find him on Twitter and Facebook.