I guess I've come to the point where all the hassle of dealer visits and so on just outweighs the small intangible benefit the Germans offer compared to the competition. And I agree that comparing a Mazda3 to a $60K car is kinda ludicrous.
A friend of mine bought a 2004 BMW X5 as a winter beater. It's the same year as my Highlander and has about the same mileage. It's a bit nicer to drive when you compare them back to back, but otherwise, at almost 12 years old, the massive price difference of the X5 feels long gone. The interior is a bit nicer (as it has leather, etc) but the materials haven't held up as well (the seat leather is cracking) and the extra options aren't really all that noticeable save for the heated seats - something I've considered having installed. The Highlander's paint is as good as the BMW - still looks great when cleaned up. The Highlander rides better but handles a bit poorer - a compromise. Squeak, rattle, etc wise, it's a complete draw - both are very tight. The BMW has better sound deadening in terms of tire noise and driveline sounds, but worse wind noise - so again a draw. The Highlanders driveline feels much stronger thanks to the large weight difference. The 3.3L six in the Toyota is as smooth as the BMW's 3.0L straight six.
The huge difference is in terms of depreciation - the new owner of the BMW (second one for this car) paid quite a bit less in the used market than he would have had for a comparable Highlander despite the Toyota being a few tens of thousands less initially. The next large gap is in terms of service and repair history. The Highlander's is brief and mostly uneventful. The BMW's looks like a phone book for a good sized city - and many of the repairs were in the many-thousands-of-dollars thanks to ridiculous parts prices and outrageous book hours and labour rates.
If we were comparing the BMW to a 2004 RX330, the story would be pretty much the same - of course the RX did depreciate more than the Highlander overall (as most lux models do) but still quite a bit less than the X5. And in all of the RX owners I've known (they're like axles in my neighbourhood, everyone has a couple) no one has had anything resembling the history of the X5 with their Lexus. In fact, quite a few of the RX owners around here replaced an X5 out of frustration - and haven't regretted that decision for second.
The Germans make some great cars. I'd take a chance on a Golf R. VW has issues, but they seem to put the GTI and R together with some care - long term reports on both are decent. Also, they don't depreciate like nuts meaning you can get out without getting pummeled. But for the most part, I lack the patience to deal with a troublesome FGC. And hell, I have time, I just don't want to spend it shuttling a car around.
In the lux SUV market, I'd pretty much only consider a Lexus or Acura. Proven reliable. Luxurious and expensive looking. Decent resale. And German SUVs overall seem to be less reliable than the cars they produce - so in the SUV arena, I'd stay away for sure.