Author Topic: Proposals and engagement rings (Read 17840 times)

PJungnitsch · « **on:** April 25, 2015, 02:28:59 pm »

So, you married people, how did yours go? I'm getting to that time and it's not exactly my area of expertise.

ArticSteve · « **Reply #1 on:** April 25, 2015, 02:37:55 pm »

That's nice for you; the prospect of marriage .

That said, "Engagement" rings are major BS. My son got a really good fake diamond one from some black market Russians in the GTA. My soon to be daughter in law then got it appraised thinking it was real and the official appraisal for insurance purpose valued it at $15K. It's a joke ... the diamond thing.

I wasn't going to buy one so my mother gave me her mothers. Tiny little thing ... it's the thought that counts.

Fobroader · « **Reply #2 on:** April 25, 2015, 02:40:45 pm »

I took my wife to the most cliched restaurant in town, La Rhonde, got down on one knee, and then bumbled and stumbled my way through a speech I prepared for a good 2-3 months.....my wife laughed at me and then said yes. Ring shopping was absolutely painful......I did not have a bloody clue to ratings and carats and all that fun stuff. Being Alberta, they thought I was a "I work at site" type and promptly showed me the tacky Housewives of New Jersey, $20k rings....

Sent from my Galaxy S3

dkaz · « **Reply #3 on:** April 25, 2015, 03:21:51 pm »

I bought the ring for my wife at brilliantearth.com which only has non conflict diamonds. Their prices are pretty good and they give you all the specs (carat, cut, colour, clarity). So $4k you can decide if you want an ok 1 ct diamond or a perfect 1/2 ct diamond.

I wonder about the trend these days of guys shopping for a ring with their fiance to be.

mmret · « **Reply #4 on:** April 25, 2015, 03:34:26 pm »

This is what I discovered.

1. Round diamonds are a commodity. Even stuff in the 1.5 carat range is quite common in reality.

2. Diamond grading varies in its standards. The two labs which are regarded as being the best are AGS and GIA New York.

3. Tiffany's grades their own diamonds. I'll let you figure out what the implications are.

4. You should go to Pricescope.com and crack open Excel.

5. In order to assess the likely "shininess" of the diamond, use the HCA score (round cut diamonds are very much figured out from a physics perspective).

6. You'll find that diamonds slightly under 1.0 carat have a distinct discount to them. Might also be true, but to a lesser extent, at the round tenths (0.6 0.7 0.8 0.9 etc.)

7. Round diamonds are so commodities you can literally buy off a spreadsheet. That's what I did. I have a regression model that I put together with Pricescope data and picked the most undervalued diamond in the range of candidates I was searching in.

8. I got diamond and the setting custom made from www.whiteflash.com. Excellent service, absolutely recommend them. I was able to webex with the CAD designer and actually move the nodes around in the CAD software they use to make the setting. LMK if you go with them I think one of us will get a referral discount.

9. A comparable diamond and setting from Birks would have been well over $10k. I was done for about $6.5k...most of that was the setting actually as Platinum prices were high at the time. And instead of an off the shelf design I got something custom.

Brig · « **Reply #5 on:** April 25, 2015, 03:53:27 pm »

Quote from: PJungnitsch on April 25, 2015, 02:28:59 pm

So, you married people, how did yours go? I'm getting to that time and it's not exactly my area of expertise.

What does Lady PJ want? That should be your starting point.

PJungnitsch · « **Reply #6 on:** April 25, 2015, 04:29:37 pm »

Quote from: Brigitte on April 25, 2015, 03:53:27 pm

Quote from: PJungnitsch on April 25, 2015, 02:28:59 pm
So, you married people, how did yours go? I'm getting to that time and it's not exactly my area of expertise.

What does Lady PJ want? That should be your starting point.

Heh, yeah, that's what it boils down too. Jewelry means nothing to me but I gave up buying for her without her input as she is very particular. It's been tough finding one she likes even looking at them together. I might just get a token one for the proposal and one she really wants later.

bridgecity · « **Reply #7 on:** April 25, 2015, 04:39:45 pm »

I had a romantic weekend getaway planned where I would propose to my then fiancé. All I had to do was pick up the ring before we left, which I planned on doing on the way back from getting my hair cut the day before we left. That day she insisted she come with me, for whatever reason, which she had never done before. Long story short, I wasn't able to pick up the ring prior to that weekend and ended up proposing to her in my company truck the following week.

As far a the ring goes, I bought her a 1 carat solitaire round cut that had pretty good specs for a diamond, but not perfect. Simple and elegant. She liked it and was happy.

. 11 years of bliss so far

HeliDriver · « **Reply #8 on:** April 25, 2015, 04:55:57 pm »

I took my wife to a jeweler in Vancouver. He talked to her about what she liked and drew up a few designs. I think she ended up with a mix of features from each. I gave him a budget and he provided the stone and the ring.

The ring showed up in the mail a few months later, and my wife spied the box and started asking questions. It's not like it was a big surprise anyway, but I ended up proposing to her in our kitchen.

Not overly romantic, but it's been 15 years and all has worked out okay.

As for the ring, I'm sure I could have gotten a better deal elsewhere (especially on the diamond), but it's a nice stone and it's nice to have a personal story behind the ring.

Brig · « **Reply #9 on:** April 25, 2015, 05:16:24 pm »

Quote from: PJungnitsch on April 25, 2015, 04:29:37 pm

Heh, yeah, that's what it boils down too. Jewelry means nothing to me but I gave up buying for her without her input as she is very particular. It's been tough finding one she likes even looking at them together. I might just get a token one for the proposal and one she really wants later.

However you do the proposal, make it meaningful. Agree that if she's hard to please, take her shopping after you've popped the question. My ex-hubby did exactly that, and I was appreciative. He did show me what he would have picked (a solitaire), and it was not my preference.

By the way, this is very exciting!

Now you have to keep us in the loop!

quadzilla · « **Reply #10 on:** April 25, 2015, 05:19:25 pm »

We talked about everything before hand so I knew what kind of ring the Mrs would want. Both of us agreed that a lot of $$$ would not be spent on this ring as we would rather take a trip than fund a piece of jewelry. It actually cost less than my cheapest bike.

Of course she didn't know when I would give her the ring so I planned it for one of our winter Lake Placid trips. The first day there we climbed a mountain but a storm came in and it was crazy cold at the top plus very strong winds. Taking off mittens/gloves was not a safe thing to do so I ended up carrying the ring up and back down.

The next day the weather was perfect and we had a hike planned out to Avalanche Pass. Our lunch spot is where you come out of the woods and sit on the lake. After we ate lunch I came up something to get here to walk out further onto the lake with me. Then did the one knee thing and of course she said yes.

Best of luck!

tenpenny · « **Reply #11 on:** April 25, 2015, 06:28:28 pm »

We just decided one august that we should get married finally, picked dec22 as a logical date. I would never buy a ring without letting her pick it out, so that's what we did. (And she bought me a Rado watch in return).

She probably brought it up, but it was just an evolution in our relationship.

Sent from my Vic20 using Java Moose

tpl · « **Reply #12 on:** April 25, 2015, 07:07:09 pm »

We didn't have either of those things. We decided. She , being not working before her job started in September, went down to the Hammersmith registry office got the stuff, go a date a week on two on. We invited our parents to our flat for dinner on the day. On the day grabbed a friend and one of my colleagues and repaired to the Registry Office, go married then went to one of our favorite pubs and had a pint or two of Black Velvet ( Guinness and Champagne in a pint glass) went home an cooked dinner. And here we are 43 years later. Sooooo it can be done without jewellery. FWIW at the time many sort of famous people got married in Hammersmith Registry office...guaranteed priest free, cheap and quick.

mmret · « **Reply #13 on:** April 25, 2015, 07:11:47 pm »

Quote from: tpl on April 25, 2015, 07:07:09 pm

We didn't have either of those things. We decided. She , being not working before her job started in September, went down to the Hammersmith registry office got the stuff, go a date a week on two on. We invited our parents to our flat for dinner on the day. On the day grabbed a friend and one of my colleagues and repaired to the Registry Office, go married then went to one of our favorite pubs and had a pint or two of Black Velvet ( Guinness and Champagne in a pint glass) went home an cooked dinner. And here we are 43 years later. Sooooo it can be done without jewellery. FWIW at the time many sort of famous people got married in Hammersmith Registry office...guaranteed priest free, cheap and quick.

I like that. Everything is too much of a big deal these days.

ArticSteve · « **Reply #14 on:** April 25, 2015, 07:28:54 pm »

I like that. Everything is too much of a big deal these days.

De Beers and their surrogates haven't run those media ads for the last 50 years for the fun of it. A diamond based engagement ring is absolutely expected in western culture. 99% of them are worthless the minute after it leaves the store.

I should say my son still spent $3K on the ring, but it was a nice display in damage control.

Latest stats: If the entire wedding exceeds $20K USD, the couple's chances of divorce increase by 3.6 times.

Mmret; please rephrase that so it makes better sense. The divorce rate is already 50%.

EDIT on the $20 to $20K

HeliDriver · « **Reply #15 on:** April 25, 2015, 07:38:17 pm »

^^ Greater than twenty bucks? Fack me, we're all doomed.

And 50% is 1:1 odds, so I guess the scenario would be 1:3.6 that you'd end up divorced. So, 78% chance.

dkaz · « **Reply #16 on:** April 25, 2015, 08:23:34 pm »

$20? Dammit, I thought we were safe when we only spent $13,500 including the engagement and wedding rings.

tpl · « **Reply #17 on:** April 25, 2015, 08:38:42 pm »

It is good that this thread comes up when young NoTo and his expensive lady are away....

Bubba · « **Reply #18 on:** April 25, 2015, 08:46:49 pm »

Quote from: tpl on April 25, 2015, 07:07:09 pm

We didn't have either of those things. We decided. She , being not working before her job started in September, went down to the Hammersmith registry office got the stuff, go a date a week on two on. We invited our parents to our flat for dinner on the day. On the day grabbed a friend and one of my colleagues and repaired to the Registry Office, go married then went to one of our favorite pubs and had a pint or two of Black Velvet ( Guinness and Champagne in a pint glass) went home an cooked dinner. And here we are 43 years later. Sooooo it can be done without jewellery. FWIW at the time many sort of famous people got married in Hammersmith Registry office...guaranteed priest free, cheap and quick.

CanuckS2K · « **Reply #19 on:** April 25, 2015, 08:56:04 pm »

Quote from: Brigitte on April 25, 2015, 03:53:27 pm

Quote from: PJungnitsch on April 25, 2015, 02:28:59 pm
So, you married people, how did yours go? I'm getting to that time and it's not exactly my area of expertise.

What does Lady PJ want? That should be your starting point.

^ THIS!

I"m guessing that you have a pretty good idea of what your future wife wants and what her tastes are. Start there and buy something that suits her within your budget. I did just that and my wife was extremely happy with my choice. I ended up proposing to her on top of Mt. Washington in New Hampshire and we got married in Mexico.