Another update:
She tested out a Foz XT limited today. Neither of us care for leather, so we would actually be going for an FXT Touring if we did it. This is at the max of our price range for a cash purchase ($2K off from Subaru right now helps). New the Q5 is way over budget, the A3/Q3 would really take a couple more months of saving up.
She likes the open greenhouse of the FXT versus the closed one in the QX (more windows, better visibility, less blindspot). She prefers the driving position too, higher up and better visibility over the hood. I forgot to mention, she's almost 5'2", or 5'3"; seats can be raised but the physical structure of the vehicle helps out a lot.
I found the FXT louder than the QX from the back seat, but she mentioned it still seems quieter than the GLI. Two adults her size plus a child in the backseat will be no problem, like the GLI, but unlike the QX.
One thing we forgot to do was to check if there's plenty of heat at the feet; she really hates that about the Jetta, lack of heat out the footwell ducts during the dead of winter. I thought she was exaggerating until I drove it a couple of times this winter, it really is terrible until the fan speed is at >75%.